It's almost 3:30am, and while most people on the Eastern seaboard are either sleeping or partying, I am up with an incredible blogging itch. I just got off of a three hour long conversation with my mother about accomplishments.
She said that I should be proud of myself because there alot of people out there that are my age that haven't gotten to do any of the things that I've done.
A friend told me that he was proud of me. I asked why and he said that because he's never known anyone my age who has held the positions and made the amount of money that I have made beginning at such a young age (I get this alot).
My opinion....Everyone has a different perception of what an accomplishment means to them. It seems that alot of people are in awe of what I've done due to my age, not necessarily my abilities. They are amazed that I've been in management for almost 12 years, implying...How can you be a manager of anything at 16 or 17 years of age? Who trusted you enough to do this?
I understand that this wasn't my mother's point, hers was more for me to see & appreciate everything I've been gifted to do.
My perception is just this....I haven't done anything amazing. Most people call me modest. I was able to sustain employment in an industry I once truly loved because that's what I did, and I did it well. Truth be told, I was to scared to try anything else. So, I just kept on trucking in fitness. Most people, through society, are engineered to beleive that you are successful or that you have accomplished something when you've made a certain amount of money. But, there are millionares who go broke...just look at the Enron scandal.
I've been through alot in my life, as many of you have. Some situations I have gotten through on top, with others I just made it through, but still....all of them only by the GRACE of GOD!!
As I continued in conversation, I started to silently cry, praying that my mother couldn't hear my sad attempt to mask it. We were on the most spiritual conversation that we have ever had with each other, and I really wanted her to understand what I now know. It seems that we have the same opinion, but it comes from different sources...I'm ok with that for now, it comes when God wants it to.
Why was I crying you ask? For a few reasons....
1) Out of frustration, or the inability, to express in words how I felt about the topic & make her agree with me without saying "but". I know that's silly, but it's what I truly felt.
2) Six or seven years ago I was told & shown what I needed to do. Yes, God told me & showed what was to happen. I made the decision not to listen and go the "easier" route...which as we all know going the opposite of God's plan is NEVER the easy route. It wasn't until this conversation did I see how stupid I was...I'M SO MAD AND DISAPPOINTED WITH MYSELF!
3) After being blessed with 27 years of life....I can only count two (2) accomplishments that I've had in my life. One was becoming born again, the other was finally, after much torture, doing what God told me to do almost seven years ago to take care of my mind, body & spirit.
I look at other's and see what I consider accomplishments, and I get upset with myself. I'm upset because had I just listened, and did what I was supposed to do maybe I would have been subject to those things years ago.
So, while 27 isn't "old" per say, I am just now coming into clarity and following my "blueprint". Why did I have to take so long?
I said this to my mother, her opinion is a little different then mine...she labled my different "accomplishments". I'd have to agree to disagree on almost all of them....but, I pose this question (because maybe it's just me)......
What is your perception of accomplishments? What are some of yours?
